Oh, god. Thomas had A Plan. This was going to give her a bigger headache than trying to find Vlad on her own, and yeah so Alice could stand to get used to a house that was always bugged but this kind of wink and nudge crap really didn't help.

"Fine, so Edward's a douche, newsflash. I'm gonna talk to him if it kills me which, by the way still a total possibility, 'cause if he's lowering himself to bartering forgiveness for help he's gotta be pretty desperate." Alice hoped the look in her eye said exactly how much she liked this whole subterfuge deal and exactly how much headache relief she was going to totally rightfully require as a result.

"You're both stubborn jerks." She didn't even have to lie to say that with a smile. "A thing of which I get you're like, stupidly proud so I won't even try to talk you out of it, besides it's kinda worked to my advantage once or twice I guess." Alice straddled him playfully and gave him a proper kiss, just enough irritation left that he'd taste it she figured, but no harm in going along with it for now. Especially if she didn't want any more of that disgusting-smelling blood on her hands.